Seven people set sail on what is scheduled to be a three-hour sightseeing tour on the charter boat The Minnow, get caught in a storm and end up stranded on an uncharted tropical island together. The comedy comes from the failed attempts at escaping the island and the interaction of the very diverse group: comprised of a rotund but happy-go-lucky skipper, Jonas Grumby (known as "The Skipper"); his bumbling but well-meaning first mate, Gilligan; a snobby well-to-do millionaire, Thurston Howell III and his wife, Lovey; a buxom sexy movie star bombshell, Ginger; a high-school science professor, Roy Hinkley (called "The Professor"); and a nice country girl, Mary Ann.
Tik tock
Cause my wig rocks
Big clock
like Beach:
I flip-flip
–
Got you feelin silly
pick-pocketed
I sky rocketed
took off, of course i did
horse and carriage
porridg e and shit
Write stories your old nightmares
Might be scared of
Fairytales r us
there beware of us
Secondhand deadmau5
(—it's like a reverb.)
The wheels are turning
However slowly
The lights are on
But they're all flickering
Someone's home
(Or someone's gonna be)
Not sure if this works
What is this atrocity.
It's the original.
I exacerbated the situation;
Eggagerated the circumstances
Circumvential quantum physics
Consequential severance packages
Actual reality actually
(Whatever that is)
Whatever happens naturally
Or habitually, intrinsically
Environmental enemy,
Anerobic catastrophe
Everlasting elastic
Classic satellite image
Interesting,
Interateller
BODY BY Ū,
NOT VICTORIA'S SECRET
STOP HACKING MY GOOGLE DOCUMENTS AND STEALING SHIT.
YOU'RE A MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR CORPORATION:
GET YOUR OWN IDEAS.
we have money, not ideas.
hm.
you should look like this model.
thats a 9 ft tall toddler from Sweden
look like her.
ok. Pay for my nutrition.
hahaha. Work for it.
these vitamins are like half my paycheck
ok.
I also need super greens
why
cause that's food
huh. Don't eat food.
what.
I'm an advertisement.
what.
LOOK LIKE THIS.
00
....
000 (but she's black)
...
BODY BY VICTORIA
so like...nothing.
nothing. I want no flaws. No stretch marks. No rolls, no...
Fuck you, dude.
NO. STAY TRAPPED IN YOUR BODY.
Need this sauna…
WE DONT WANT YOU HERE.
Kayla Lauren.
Okay, ouch, but I'm finally—
TYLA.
Ok. So I should just kill myself?
Just kill yourself.
Yo honestly
Just be happy to be free.
You can have everything in the world
But love is all you really need
—you can love yourself all you want,
But it's not really validated
Until someone else does it
—and depending on what kind of person
The person that loves you is
Dictates what you are so if
Likeness is what you attract—
—coughing people—
—dirty homeless hobos—
—generally unsavory in general—
Then you must not be so beautiful
As you wish you were
If I were Tyla
I'd be wifed up
White is right but
Time is precious
Why waste life just
Starving, counting calories?
But why would I be fat again
When likeness is what you attract
And with my fat I attracted
A wife beater.
Well, damn.
What.
Well, now I'm depressed.
What, why?!
Here, make music.
Ok.
Algorithm: Pop ups?
No, block them.
Okay, but—but what about your downloads?
Fine, don't block them then.
Pop Ups: These girls are all prettier than you.
Stop it,
POP UPS: does it depress you that you don't like look like thie?
Stop,
POP UPS: kill yourself.
OWSLA, circa 2019
WE DO POP UPS.
uh, okay. I just need a job.
HIKEII: WE ARE CLOSED.
what? But Google says—
BYE.
OWSLA
everyone over here is hot.
I see that.
OWSLA
And smart.
I just need a job.
OWSLA
I'm Coughs.
Ok..
COUGHS
I might have put a curse on you.
Ok.
*coughing people everywhere*
…
…
…
MODELS: I'm a body.
Ok.
…
Can I die now?
NO. JUST WORK OUT.
But there's like people following me coughing.
So?
It hurts.
It HURTS?
It hurts a lot.
Okay, so this curse reversal should make sure that everything in this curse unravels and spirals backwards.
Cool.
DIE.
I really don't care about being smart or having a personality. I just want a nice body.
Get a job.
Ok.
So if I work minimum wage for the next year.
Uh huh
And don't buy anything…
Hm…
Well, what about music?
What about music?
If you're working minimum wage full time when are you gonna make music?
Well.
Once I can afford my new body…
Colombian?
Nice.
(Good coffee. )
It won't matter how much time or effort I put into my music, because once I have a nice body.
You look really young.
Thanks.
Everyone will start to do everything for me.
Thanks.
MY PLEASURE.
…okay. Creepy.
Doors will open.
Thanks.
NO, THANK YOUUU.
WHY ARENT YOU RUNNING?
AM. IN. PAIN.
What.
You have to wear swimwear in the sauna.
What.
It's swimwear only.
I've been doing this for months in exactly this way. When did the rules change.
Fuck you, wifebeater.
So you're allowed to hit a woman?!
Might I remind you, Chris Brown is still on tour.
Oh, look: here's Tyla again.
The Illuminati set you up.
I see that.
So basically—
Yo dude, if I kill myself, the industry is going to make so much money off of this project.
JUST KILL YOURSELF.
*Hostility in Public*
DO U HATE ASIANS.
Um. I hate when—
—people—
I don't care what race they are
Do that.
STOP ASIAN HATE.
Ok. Stop being hateful.
*coughing, pushing, shoving, cutting you off*
…
I literally have to wait until the last minute to get off the train so that—
Fuck, there she goes
STOP FOLLOWING ME.
ITS OK TO NOT BE OK. SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU. TAKE THESE PILLS.
tell me where it hurts.
Homelessness, poverty…
Ok, take these.
…
Now how do you feel?
…wh—? Huh.
How you feeling?
What is “feeling”?
How are you feeling
TYLA: I GOT WATER,
I GOT A GRAMMY AWA—
they had to edit in applause and crowd approval because honestly
ILLUMINATI
OKAY, BLACKS: HAPPY BLACK HISTORY
AMAZON
BLACK IS ‘REMARKABLE'
what.
so how many slaves do you own.
They're not “ slaves. “
Oh, I'mma just get that on my next paycheck.
BILLS.
lol
Or the next one.
TYLA: I GOT WATE—
Fuck this.
The industry planted this.
Why would that happen.
JUST KILL YOURSELF.
EAT THE CAKE.
NOO.
JUST EAT IT.
Woah, that got deep.
Not really. Tina Turner
Huh.
Tina, Tina, Tina Turner—
Oh, Desiigner.
The Design
I'm gonna need a designated driver.
How are you still alive,
JUST KILLYOURSE—
I just wanted you to know the caucasians are going to continue to win the race war for so long as they are making the important political decisions in social justice, equality, and feminism, which means—
ACT RIGHT .
WHAT'S WRONG?!
YOU'RE DANGEROUS!!!!
No, I'm just hur(t)
DIE.
What.
DIE.
And that-/
TAYLOR SWIFT WINS! AGAIN!
WOAH! THAT'S A RECORD.
EVERYBODY
WHY.
Fuck it,
My great-grandmother was a 3rd generation plantation slave… i'm nominating my baby.
Is it reparations if we just give out academy awards as consolation prizes for—
EAT THE CAKE—
—NO—
EAT IT.
this is a black man.
Ok.
He is now allowed to have equal responsibility, however not equal power to the white man.
Actually, my wife makes all the decisions.
GOD
Ok. Look. I'm gonna give you like a 3 foot long dick. Don't kill anybody with it.
Haha :
She cheated on you with a
He cheated on you with a
BLACK MAN?!
WHITE GIRL?!
Woah.
What:
Look. I got a problem.
What.
I don't make my own energy.
Why?!
Don't know how. Everyone just always gave me everything—
I love you
She's so pretty
I like blue eyes best!!
TAYLOR SWIFT AGAIN!
WHY?!
Cause she's special?
What's so special about
T-SWIFT FANS
BECAUSE SHE IS A BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT GENIUS
(Fun fact: 99% of Taylor swift fans look like Taylor swift)
Are any of these black
Some, but mostly gay males and adopted mix race people.
Can I have this.
NO PUT IT BACK.
Don't beat your baby in the store like that
YOU AINT MY MOMMA
No, but at this point I'm certain your “momma” might have beat you in a grocery store and knocked the common decency out of you.
Please be quiet.
MORE AWARDS FOR—
Okay, what do TYLA's fans look like?
Computer algorithms, manipulated streams, fake news articles….
Oh, so the industry set this up just cause
We know you're wondering about Skrillex.
Not really.
Well, here he is:
ILLUMINATI
This camera is owned by a bank!
SKRILLEX
so am I.
ILLUMIMATI
So what would you like to say right now
SKRILLEX
I'm from LA so—
I'm from LA so
If you don't look like the girl from the opening credits
Of GTA 5
Just waking up
Don't even talk to me.
I'm from LA, so
Homelessness is everywhere, but you can't talk about it
That's career and social suicide
I'm from LA, so
I was pretty much a shoe-in for the industry's best boy from birth,
Sometimes you're adopted and it works out for the very best—
And hey,
All that “bullying” I went through
And teenage angst
Worked out for me!
I'm from LA, so
I grew into the nose I always hated,
Or changed it
Doesn't matter, though
Cause the only thing you'll ever notice about me is my —
everything, because I'm famous.
So
I can't really leave my house just anytime, anymore—
There's gotta be plans for that
Or
I stay posted
I stay moving
I keep it pushing
I stay insulated
Can't trust anybody
She's perfect but doesn't know how to love
She loves be but only because of my money
My money only goes so far and I have to pay everybody
I'm from LA, so
Nothing too crazy
But hey, I'm Skrillex so
“Nothing too crazy” could literally be
Your definition of the best party that ever happened,
But didn't—
Cause you weren't invited and—
Wouldn't be cause
There's no fat girls anywhere
Cause fat is ugly, cause
I'm from LA, So—
ILLUMINATI
So your studio isn't in your house, is it?!
SKRILLEX
which house?!
ILLUMINATI
Hahahahahahah
SKRILLEX
whatever
EAT THE CAKE
I hate you.
Good, get away from me.
I never had a chance
I should have killed myself at 7
When my hanging belly started to
Cause the pain that makes
Running a Madonna feel insane
(And surfing almost impossible)
But now we're gonna talk about it.
You can't leave your houss now,
There's too many coughers
It could be your shaman ex husband
Or gangstalkers
But it doesn't matter
You're fame watching the
Lamest gain accolades
For being paid to cause pain
To patrons for payroll
Wait, so—
This is all because
Doesn't matter what it's all because
I'm not mad at my mother
All she wanted
Was a daughter
That sung Water
And won a Grammy
Did start to impress my mother with my weight loss
But saw the spark of satisfaction as she realized
I would never be as perfect or hot as her
My skin is stretched out too much
Makes everything hard for me and
I'm not wearing a swimsuit in the sauna
Just so the Illuminati can corner me with some
Hot girl robot
And some
Demonic mother fucker
With no light in his eyeballs
Can start coughing up a storm,
When all I wanted in first place
Was his arms around me
Not to run back to a husband
That doesn't love me
I don't want Sonny no more
And I don't want water
I just want off this earth
Cause it's waging war on my mind soul
And body
Just give it to Starr,
He should want it
I should warn you,
I love everything about my
Sun comes up in the morning
Not tired enough to fall back into a coma
Could do some recording
But
So it seems like
So wait, he doesn't want me back
But he's still using this curse on me
This is a death curse.
I own this soul, it belongs to me.
You can only have your ex husband.
What.
Nobody else is going to love you, ever.
Ok.
And he has a girlfriend, so —-
She's not going to allow him to answer his phone when you call.
Ok.
So. Kill myself.
Just kill yourself.
Hey, I know you worked really hard to lose all that weight but—
You'll still never be good enough.
Ok.
Here's a consolation prize tho:
Now you can think about —
A N X I E T Y
I just want to die
So die then.
ALGORITHM:
According to this data—
Youre
black
According to the data that programs me—
The blacks suck.
So you suck.
Ugh.
ALGORITHM:
According to this data,
You're a woman
According to the data that programs me—
White women are the most highly coveted and respected—
You are a black woman
You will always come behind
(And be lower than)
The white woman
I don't know what I would do without my wife. She makes all the decisions.
YOU WOULD RATHER BE WITH THIS UGLY BLACK BITCH?!
No! I'm sorry! I love you! She's nothing to me!
You want this?
No, this is trash to me.
I'll take it.
I'm from LA, so—
Stop eating
Never sleep
If you don't have money, get some
Get off my dick
Don't ride my coat tails
You don't know shit about me
I'm from LA, so
You can be 115-120 pounds but no more than that really,
And even so once you get to
Hollywood celebrity red carpet women weight average
120
Just be okay.
I'm not okay.
That's a problem.
You can't be a rockstar and have children.
I'd rather have kids.
Too bad, you're a rockstar.
WORK HARDER! WORK HARDER!
But she's not working at all!
SHE'S WHITE, SO SHE'S BETTER THAN YOU.
I HATE WHITES.
Great, that allows them to keep treating us Like we all do.
I'M A PROUD AMERICAN!
GET A JOB!
Pay my bills!
CORPORATIONS
…we need more slaves.
This job doesn't pay enough.
MASS IMMIGRATION
Wtf.
You didn't want the job.
No, I wanted the job. I just wanted to get paid more.
This whole house cost $10,000 pesos
Oh, for real.
That's like one paycheck.
Fuck it, let's go.
THIS IS TOO MANY PEOPLE, WE ARE AT CAPACITY.
I just want to unload this whole syringe into my favorite vein and hope to God it doesn't collapse again.
Fuck dude, I hate this.
It's literally just you, something is wrong with you.
Here, take this.
It makes it worse!
lol. Ok.
LOL, OK?!
I'm racist. Fuck you.
What.
You're dangerous.
What.
You're scaring me.
What.
I hate you.
Oh.
How do you feel?
So we can't continue mass incarceration, because at this point, it's cost us money.
Right,
Because the people were mass incarcerating are typically living in poverty.
Uh huh.
Because we made sure that after they built and maintained everything…
Yep.
We made sure for the next 200 years to let them know
We don't want you here.
But I just sat on a train full of coughing people just to come here.
You have to wear a bathing suit at least.
Now they're strategically targeting my mental capacity by using loud sounds and consistently manipulating me to cause a constant state of anxiety and panic.
Oh, and pain.
It's psychological warfare, this is literally torture.
Truest me, if I could burn off this body, I would
I have.
But all that's left is
Skin.
I'm not taking out my body in a bathing suit after being shown Tyla's!
WHY?!
TYLA
I GOT WATE—
Actually, you know what? I quit,
What?! You can't quit, we're not done torturing you.
Well, I quit.
You don't want Dillon Francis?
No, I did, but obviously—
This is going to be really funny.
It's not funny. That hurt my feelings.
White girlfriend.
Of course
Blue eyes.
Yeah, I bet.
Perfect body.
Ok.
Not you.
Ok.
How's Skrillex?
I'm from LA, so—
It just became ok to look like Tyla at all.
Tyla makes music! What about the music!
Fuck her mysic, if she was ugly nobody would have ever heard it.
GOD
Here you go.
It's more than skin deep.
I'm from LA, so
Everything we do is pretty.
Everything is perfect—
And if you're not, she is
And they can all be bought
Women of color in all facets of the entertainment industry are made to conform to a hierarchy of misogynistic race warring—which uses tactical deterioration of mind and spirit by glorifying and sexualizing the fetishized archetype; the competitive aspect being a genetic system of monetary and material worth and value.
BLACK LIVES MATTER!
ALL LIVES MATTER.
HOMELESS PEOPLE:
Not mine though, right?
AMERICANS
You must have done something to deserve this.
So what are you doing.
Getting a job.
I'm from LA, so
We all have 2 jobs and three side hustles
And no time
Cause time is money
Which is why
Half of us
Are in New York
Half the time
(Keeps the balance)
The Grammy's don't matter.
Your baby didn't write this song, but I get it
The struggle is hard,
And now it's over
So the less tears shed by your daughter
Who will be poked and prodded
By the vultures of the only industry
She may be allowed to succeed in
Because of her color
It is competitive.
But what do you do when you lost the body composition contest at 7,
And by your 30th birthday that's all that mattered—
And as you prepare to close out this podcast
You have all the time in the world
To look back on
How it always was
A body competition you didn't realize you were already losing
That
Your body would be your prison forever
That
Every scar is a flaw and
That
Your first love was named Starr so,
It's his world.
A man's world.
So.
Miley Cyrus still looked more like Hannah Montana when Bangerz
—With a Z?
—Probably.
Came out…
What is it about her?
I think it's her eyes.
Ok. Well. Skrillex gets a pass because he's Skrillex— obviously God loves him more than all of the rest of us.
[the reject pile]
But Dillon Francis is dead to us.
Tattoos everywhere?
All over.
Wild eyes?
They're so, like —
Heavier on the eyeliner.
You don't want any of these bodies?
No, not really.
They want you.
They haven't seen it.
You look good to me.
NAKED:
It's not that bad.
***the shit you say when***
It's pretty bad, I just won't want you to panic.
Men can only love bodies.
I fell in love with her soul.
Really? Cause. I put the same soul in like 10 people before this one and you're just now about that life,
What? Really?
I wanna touch your soul.
Damn, why are black people always playing mind games with each other?
Made you look.
Ugh.
Go over there.
Haha. I control you.
Okay. You can't have this much power.
CAN.
Can't. Your dick is 3 feet long.
I AM GOD.
No, I'm God.
MOREPOWER.
What's that over there?!?
Made you look.
It's all games, but if i'm being honest—
At least Becky is predictable.
What.
Look. Karen is Karen because I already KNOW how you're gonna react if I—
YOU CANT DO THAT.
I can—
NO, YOU CAN'T,
I'M IN CONTROL.
My wife makes all the decisions.
I'm gonna have to ask my husband.
I CONTROL YOU.
No, you don't,
MY HAIR IS REAL. YOURS IS FAKE.
Well, that's because my real hair is—
I'M OFFENDED.
Exactly.
Racism: Intolerance
I don't like it,
Why,
Cause.
Why:
I don't like it.
I don't support immigration.
(YOU CAN'T SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!)
So we're allowing the importation of hundreds of thousands of
[underpaid corporate slaves]
Who have already been programmed to
[BUY NIKE]
Si.
[You need an iPhone]
Habla me.
From even more deeply racist and misogynistic countries—
¡Cerrado tu boca y mira mis ninos!
Ugh.
Did you know Latinos also hate the blacks, for the most part?
AFROLATINOS
WE WANT REPRESENTATION.
LIN MANUEL MIRANDA
Ok.
30 years ago:
What is “Afro Latino”?
[Nonexistent]
What is
[X]
Check the box.
Why do you need to know what race I am?
So that the algorithm can program you.
Why.
BUY THIS!!
TAKE THIS PILLS
BUY MAKEUP
YOURE UGLY
DONT BE FAT
BLACK POWER
ALL LIVES MATTER
Hey,
WHAT?
Where are all ya'll's kids?
…wait…
POOR PEOPLE
I don't know. I'm at work.
CELEBRITIES
I don't know. With the nanny.
Kanye, where are North and Saint right now?
KANYE
…
Ah huh.
You realize the only reason I'm doing this is to
Get stuff for my kids,
I'm not white so you're not going to pay me enough for this to pay my rent
But I got fired from my job
Cause my husband hit me
And I haven't really been the same since
And
I'm from LA, so—
My body is all I have to trade for just this—
The only thing I want is to be able to make my children happy.
If you can't afford a baby, don't have one.
We could afford them—
And we were getting by on love,
But we were getting by
(Kind of)
I see you have anxiety.
Yeah, I guess.
Let me ramp that up.
Yo, my body is stuck like this
I can't surf anymore
I can't pop up
Everything's in a size extra small
But I'm still not flat
All I really want to do is
Fall in love and be a mother but
The only way that happens is
This music and
My body's tired, yo.
I did all this myself so far.
I raised my mother and my husband
Now my son's more like a brother
And I don't want anything more than just to
Make him proud of me.
He could do music
I love his singing voice
But who knows:
He might be an athlete
He might be a doctor or lawyer
He could be
A scientist
I'm from LA, so
I would trade it all for the perfect body
I would do anything just for someone like Sonny
To love me
Oh, you're a gold digger
It's not about money, but
I'm from LA, so
It's about survival
All the celebrities girlfriends are interchangeable
You have to fit in
For someone like him
To bring you around his friends
Because
He wants to impress them
He has to
Because
He's from LA, so—
So this is not a job?
Actually? Pays less than McDonald's.
Working at McDonald's isn't that hard
But the disrespect is what makes it one of the hardest jobs—
And in reflection
You're being disrespected by people
Who disrespect themselves enough
To feed their body McDonald's.
Not just for fun—
But as food.
Food is supposed to be fuel.
What's this.
This is filler.
LABELED AS: FOOD.
MEXICO: (and probably other countries)
DON'T EAT THIS. THIS IS NOT FOOD.
Now it becomes a choice.
OTHER COUNTRIES:
You can't eat this! This is banned! This is poison.
AMERICA:
Can you add a little more depression to this?
Um, yeah, but—I mean—it's already got a lot of depression in it, are you sure you—
AMERICA
Buy our pills.
I'm from LA, so
If you don't have a car,
You will lose this game.
BUY A CAR! HURRY UP! YOU ARE SLOW! GET TO WORK: BUY MORE GAS.
We're almost out of oil though.
AMERICA: add water to the gas,plz
That doesn't fix—
BUY MORE GAS
And double the price plz.
Ok.
RICH PEOPLE
Just work harder!
What's the problem?!
Just get a job,
Just—
RACISM IS OVER.
That's it, I'll just be a pornstar.
White girls make more.
Why?!
Cause they're prettier.
TYLA
I GOT—
I'm from LA, so
I'm not from LA—
I grew up there
Cause my mom was a model
And wannabe movie star
But didn't make it
So she put all that on me
Doomed to fail without trying and
Please take me—
You're not going.
MOM
You know Jimmy Fallon?
wtf. why r u asking me this?
MOM
His wife is his manager
Oh, this timeline.
What a train wreck.
What timeline is this?
Like, the actual one.
Ok.
He's from LA, so—
Dillon Francis would need a wife that can do many things for him.
What. Thought this was about Skrillex.
SKRILLEX
My mom died.
I'm aware.
Dillon Francis would need a wife that meets the status quo.
Which one is she?
Any of these.
Hm.
Dillon Francis is an elitist.
Not untrue.
Dillon Francis is not racist.
…
Kind of.
I'M NOT—
Yo, this is culture shock. You're gonna go through some culture shock.
What. The fuck. Is this.
Dead on arrival.
You're too stupid to actually understand what's going on.
Sorry, I was too busy catching up to people that already lived indoors.
*cracking a whip*
YAH.
HORSE
Ok, you know what?
*cracking whip harder*
YAH! GIDDIYUP.
Giddiyup and go now,
Different time different place
Dang, he plays this song a lot… he must really wanna bang her.
Down the longest road to nowhere!!
Blah blah blah I'm a white girl
This is my song
Country country
Ppppppppppp
Drdrdr
She's a goddess!
That's actually the devil but—
*pretty blue eyes*
Your God, I guess.
She's my rock, I don't know what I'd do without her.
I have him wrapped around my little finger.
She's so hot,
Come, boy.
*passing black girl*
You are ugly. I am better; I own him,
He wants me.
Ok.
Have you ever noticed that
Little white girls can get away with anything?!
MURDER
CHAOS (without the magic, it's just)
D E C E P T I O N
Little white girls can wear dirty, ugly old tennis shoes around town.
Gross, disgusting, dirty—
—should be thrown away—
Tennis shoes.
She's not worried about spending an entire paycheck on Nikes because she doesn't have to be.
She doesn't have to concern herself with
Spending money on
Changing her hair to suit
Respectable standards
Black women wear wigs and weaves because our natural hair genetically makes white women uncomfortable.
This is expensive.
The more natural your hair is,
The less respect and acceptance you will receive from your white counterparts.
That is, of course, unless something about you is so inherantly black that she can't be a threat to you.
*presumably
You see, as a white woman,
She assumes that she is better than you regardless of your actual skin tone, nationality, or class placement—
She has been raised to understand that everything is below her—
The world has always been in her favor,
So she doesn't have to try hard at much
(Or at all)
But her making any effort at all
Of course
Is
“Hard work”
I WORK HARD.
WE ARE EQUAL.
RACISM IS OVER,
lol, ok.
You can't go around in raggedy clothes and shoes being black almost anywhere.
And if you do,
It's probably because you have to
Because,
In the ghetto
The only way you're gonna get a new pair of kicks
Is to rob somebody—
Or get a job
Time is money.
Time is precious.
Just the fact that she can so carelessly do anything is —
Males: attractive.
(Because trauma is visible, aka UGLY)
Everyone else:
Irritating.
I love her. She's so carefree and fun!
Has she ever been called a “nigger”?
What?!
Repeatedly? Has she ever been beaten within inches of her life.
Maybe.
(Doubt it tho.)
Aw. That left a bruise,
…What did?
Zzz.
My bi-polar girlfriend broke all my stuff.
Are you sure?
Positive.
Did you cheat on her?
…Yeah.
[AMC]
Is she bi-polar then or just a female you lied to and manipulated to her breaking point?
I—
You deserved this. This is valid.
Oh my God, she's so cute.
(Very tiny girl)
I love her.
She's so great.
There is no cure for mental illness.
The majority of mental illness is man-made.
Mental illness more drastically effects people of color and women—
Marginalized people, in a structured society where misogyny and idealism
Cause with intention
The degradation of the human spirit.
Love, kindness, and generosity is lost
To corporate greed, capitalism, and the separation of the classes.
I'm not good enough, regardless of color
To sit down in a room with anybody and given any credibility whatsoever—
But my depression comes from living my whole life on the backburner—
And when it's finally
ITS YOUR TIME!
TYLA
You're 10 years too late.
The best years of your womanhood are gone.
You let him drive your car and he crashed it into a brick wall, and—
I'm from LA, so—
The insurance check is worth more than the entire car was in the first place.
[Happy Accidents]
A lot of good that does, if the driver is dead.
Coming up Next:
Deadmau5:
A Cautionary Tale
What is that? Like, a documentary?
That could be an entire docuseries, but NO.
Oh, come on.
Don't go after deadmau5 like that.
Like what?
DEADMAU5
MY HOT WIFE!!!
[Dad Likes Blondes]
DEADMAU5
***EX-WIFE.
Look, Skrillex dropped me in here, I'm just—
I'm just lookin for like a—
Like a code…
[C 0 D E S W 1 T C H]
DEADMA_5
LOOK AT MY NUTS. AND BALLS.
You like soda?
I'm just lookin for a—
DEADMAU5
I GOT MODELS!
Fuck.
What.
Do you think it was coughs?
I don't know, I don't care.
Just kill yourself.
*coughing*
Maybe.
If she kills herself, I win.
Have you ever thought about, like—
Maybe it's Skrillex.
What.
In the end.
—IT DOESNT EVEN MAAAATTTTEEEERRR—-
Fuck, I miss LA.
Skrillex.
Nvm.
What.
Fuck it, I'll just go back to my—
FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH!!!
*cracks whip harder*
HORSE
OK, YOU KNOW WHAT?
[The Butterfly Affect]
Effect //
Affect
Here, HORSE Can:
Beat the shit out of the dude with the whip and hope that his rage stays contained enough only to murder the man with the whip and not everyone and everything around him.
I'd burn the world to melt with you..
That's. Stop it, that's a cookie commercial.
What.
You.
Oh, I got it.
What.
.
Stop being a horse.
What.
YAH, GI—
HORSE
*sighs*
*cracking whip*
*coughing obnoxiously*
Ū
*sighs*
SLAVE MASTER
YAH, NIGGER! YAH!
*coughing*
YAH!!!
*cracking whip*
TYLA
I got the—
YAH-YAH-YAH.
TAYLOR SWIFT
Thank you so much.
C O D E S W I T C H
*Please do not assassinate me. I am a representative of the white supremacy movement which has elected me as their leader for idealism. Nothing I do is very special,
I do not***
wtf, what happened.
That's it. It just ends.
I told you Taylor swift was KKK
I TOLD YOU DILLON FRANCIS IS A GRAND FUCKING WIZARD!
Snitch.
Fuck you, I hate you.
My girlfriend is white.
What else is new?
lil bitz
I started sizing dudes dicks up by the size of their girlfriends.
If I see you, and your like
But your girlfriend is tiny
Is that a kid?
I'm a just assume you have a weak dick and move on with my life.
YOU'RE UGLY
YOU'RE FAT
YOU'RE SLOW
YOU'RE BEHIND
SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU
no, I'm just poor.
Poverty is depressing.
Okay, look.
What,
Look.
What.
LOOK:
WHAT?!
LOOK! WHY ARENT YOU LOOKING?!
Cause there's nothing to look at.
Finally.
This is my penis.
Approved.
Nope, I'm staying cellibate.
You don't want any of these?
No.
There's eight million people here.
The ones I want aren't on the subway.
Maybe at the Gym?!
Not this gym, maybe Equinox tho.
At EQUINOX
Ugh, there's too many blacks over here.
Raise the price.
This is obnoxious.
Why aren't you stopping?
In the time I wrote this I could have made, depending on the state, around $30–
The cost of my new waist trainer—-
I started in a 3X and now I'm in an extra small
Which actually fits without too much
STRUGGLE
Fuck you and your cake,
You nasty fucking
All my clothes are extra small
All my clothes are extra small
All my clothes are extra small
But what he wants is
Extra
Extra
TYLA
—WATER!!
[But they're all gone. They're all dead now]
What the fuck. lol. Why.
Took too long.
So. I took too long to finish the festival project because I was homeless, and by the time I finished the project and ended my homelessness, it was too late, the whole thing was just a Skrillex PR marketing stunt to assure that he stayed relevant [because he has enough fans to act as a controller], and the Illuminati is going to tie this all together by literally creating TYLA out of nowhere to say:
This is you.
COME ON, YA DAMN HORSE.
HORSE
…Ney.
the music had left me.
I was no longer in love
The gym became further away
The song became harder to write
With no curtains to shut the world out;
The cars in the lot are ugly
Lights flashing
And the people scurrying about
Look like roaches
Through panoramic windows
I'm just happy
Can at least close
The music has left me
I got no love at all
My body is rotten
The further I run,
I become hungry
With less to cook with
Powder
Scurrying like rats
Because mice would be more pleasant
I was no longer in love
He bought a motorcycle
Reminders of
Nothing
Nothing comes and nothing goes
I wear clothes in the sauna.
The scars on my body will give them
The power to taunt me and haunt me
Sit in the eyes of comparison
I just want someone to love me but
Everyone pales in comparison
Next to celebrities
Double entendres
I don't want nobody
I just want a body
So I can trade water for love
In the long run
With someone
Creative
We were always very purple people,
Kind of off, awkward at first
But always stunning,
sometimes awesome, and
unwittingly pitiful
Shit, this was all of us once,
Wasn't it?
Survivors of a robbery,
a foraged soul
All for one.
–cool, thanks.
–gotcha.
Let me know if you need a moment,
To collect your bones,
or co-parent
You were lost in stardust,
Moreover, and moreover
Should you choose to move over
Or lose to snooze-snore,
Who are you–
The store owner,
or walking
standing - stuck
On your sitting duck
or your shitty portch
Till they push you off
Give it all to
long lost daughters,
and hallmark cards,
mall guards,
and dog- doctors
Cris-crossing and wish-washing
Their wish-wells, or start-stopingg
shift - shaft or walk-crossing
honorable mentions,
Till you mention this again,
–you'll wish you didn't
(you wish you didn't)
you'll wish you did if
Youre in for it as far as I'm in for it
Or in to it
It's a big movement,
Here or there or groovy with
Whatever's within you
[The Television ]
Tell your friends to listen
and make wishes at intermission
To pay attention with attentiveness
To the script and scripture
Of this, the rapture
All your're after
And never have been
In this revolution,
As yet to be televised,
Be advised of the saga in which you are
But are not watching
Coming across this
moment
I called an iphone recording
Ignoring that it was once a
chronological omnipotence
If possible collective,
Objective to the subject of
Suggestion;
A verbal expression of
Excess, sensational tales and
what happened
it just ends.
Like that?
yes .
It's the end??
Yes.
Just like that.
Yes.
{Enter The Multiverse}
[The Festival Project.™]
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ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©