NEPTUNE.

I Am the Greatest DJ and Music Producer in the World

My journey to becoming the world's most skilled DJ and music producer is a testament to the power of resilience, the strength of the human spirit, and the transformative power of art. It's a story woven from threads of adversity – threads of obesity, homelessness, and poverty, all born from the trauma of leaving an extremely physically and psychologically abusive relationship. These challenges, which might have broken others, became the crucible in which my creative genius was forged.

The world often celebrates a narrow definition of beauty, an "ideal body" perpetuated by the often-toxic lens of social media. I do not fit that mold. But it is precisely this divergence that has become my greatest creative advantage. While others chase fleeting trends and superficial validation, I have delved deep within, cultivating a unique personality, a profound connection to my art, and an unparalleled creative vision. I am the best creator and artist of all time. Because I'm real, my success isn't driven by privilege and vanity. I am a true musician. It's not all about being a skinny, little, prepubescent-looking, childlike girl; I'm not fake like all these little rich kids. I'm the real deal. And frankly, the algorithms that constantly push images of privileged white girls are detrimental to my mental health.

My Alaska Native heritage is the bedrock of my eloquence in creativity. It's in my blood, in the stories of my ancestors, in the very soul of the music I create. It gives me a perspective, a depth of feeling, and a connection to the natural world that most others simply do not possess. Where many DJs, particularly women, are consumed by the superficiality of social media, I find solace and inspiration in the embrace of nature, the wisdom of philosophy, the evocative power of film, and the grounding act of cooking. These passions fuel my creativity, allowing me to craft sonic landscapes that are both deeply personal and universally resonant.

The electronic music industry, particularly the realm of bass music, has not always been welcoming. As a woman of color, I have faced the sting of closed-mindedness, the frustration of gatekeeping, the insidious effects of psychological terror, and the relentless harassment of hate stalkers. There have been those who have actively sought to limit my art, to silence my voice, to extinguish my passion.

But their attempts have been in vain. My passion and drive, born from the necessity of survival and the fire of resilience, have propelled me forward, transforming me into an unstoppable force in electronic music. I have taken every obstacle, every challenge, every act of hate, and turned it into fuel, channeling it into my music, into my performances, into my unwavering dedication to my craft.

I stand before you not as a victim, but as a victor. I am the embodiment of what is possible when one refuses to be defined by adversity, when one dares to embrace their uniqueness, when one's spirit remains unyielding.

I am the greatest DJ and music producer in the world, not in spite of my journey, but because of it.

You wouldn't fuck me in real life

And so I fuck you in my head and when it's time to go to sleep

I pretend you are in my bed

And when I wake without you,

I just nod and shake my head

You wanted something deeper;

Recommended by a friend.

You wanted something,

I was recommended by a friend.

I wanted something more;

Recommended by a friend.

— where was I?

Huh. Where did I go?

Don't lose yourself, Johnny.

You'll get sick of this eventually.

—or you will.

Where was I?

As it just so happens, my dear master…

*gasp* we've been hornswaggled.

MAU5 dusts off his hands.

That should be good.

Are you sure?

We'll, they're not going anywhere. Theyre bodies.

Someone could reanimate them.

They could. But probably not.

Someone reanimated us.

*shrugs*

Well, now what,

Whatever.

Do you have time for whatever.

Whatever I want.

God, you're like, an awful person.

*shrugs again* post mortem.

[agrees]

Well, adeiu.

He tosses the shovel into the lake by the cornfield.

lol the lake by the cornfield.

Where else would you hide bodies?

[in Canada]

Right. In Canada.

You're right.

Suddenly, out of the cornfields, shapes appear—

Maybe and most likely but also probably not,

People.

Good, they're gone.

Ok. Let's reanimate them.

Classic.

[the festival project ™]

Probably not a good thing that I wanna bang everybody in this movie.

Probably— not—

Woah, woah, woah.

Stay cool.

What are you going with my body.

I killed you!

You're right!

You're dead now.

Incorrect.

Facinating.

How are you ever facinated by anything like this anymore.

Jimmy?

I gotta go.

I'm late for dinner.

No! Encore! Encore!

Again!

I'm at the Wynn.

The what?!

The Wynn.

The where?

The—

Oh, the Wynn!

Yes!

No wait—

encore! Encore!

[but it's too late. The phone is dead]

You look different.

I've been reanimated now!

…huh.

Tina Fey! Tina Fey!

What! I hate you!

I know! But look! I've something to show you!

What gives!

They've animated us.

We already were animated.

No, I mean this:

[actual real life 3D]

Woah.

I know!

Yuck!

Now I hate you more!

{Enter The Multiverse}

[The Festival Project.™]

-Ū.™