Split Definition: Why Relationships Feel So Intense (and What to Do About It)


Split Definition: Why Relationships Feel So Intense (and What to Do About It)


Some relationships don't fall apart because there's no love — they fall apart because you keep trying to “fix” a feeling you can't name. If you've ever thought, “Why do I feel fine alone, but incomplete with someone… or like something is missing unless they show up a certain way?”…you're not too needy, too intense, or “bad at relationships.” You might be living out a Split Definition pattern — where your energy is designed with a natural gap, and your mind turns that gap into a story: it's me… or it's you.

In today's episode, we break down what Split Definition actually is (simple vs. wide splits), why it can create that push-pull dynamic inside partnerships, and how to stop outsourcing wholeness to the people you love.

Learn:

  • Why Split Definition can feel like “something is missing” (and why you're not broken)

  • How to tell if you're Single definition, Simple Split, Wide Split, Triple split, or Quad split

  • Why Simple Splits tend to internalize it (“something is wrong with me”)

  • Why Wide Splits tend to externalize it (“something is wrong with you”)

  • How “bridging gates” work (and why certain people feel like relief)

  • Why Split Definition teaches cooperation in relationships

  • How conditioning turns the “bridge” into a relationship trap

  • How to stop looking for “completion” in a partner

  • Why relationship advice online often fails (it's too generic)

  • How to ask for what you need without self-abandoning

  • Why emotional authority + non-emotional partners can feel out of sync

  • How to use your Strategy & Authority to reduce relationship friction

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