It Took But A Kiss - Kiss Kruise 2022 saved my mental state- the effects of social isolation on mental health


It Took But A Kiss - Kiss Kruise 2022 saved my mental state- the effects of social isolation on mental health


This fourth podcast focuses on the detremental effects of social isolation on mental health, and how finding a purpose and your happy place can change your life. This is not only a story of how the Kiss Kruise transformed my mental state, but also focuses on the importance of individuals doing what they enjoy and living their lives to the fullest.


Episode Transcript
Hello, and welcome to Karen's Medical cor. I'm Karen O'Day. I'm a family nurse practitioner and a certified nurse midwife, owner and practitioner at Evercare Family Practice. Today we're doing a podcast called, it Took, but a kiss. And this podcast is one that's very close to my heart because it really helped put into perspective things that were important in my life. You know, over the past several years with Covid, everybody's life has changed. Not only individuals who had themselves or family members or friends that were devastated by this absolutely horrible virus, but medical professionals as well. I don't think anybody can say that they weren't somehow impacted by the Covid 19 virus, and were still impacted today. But I think 2020 and 2021 were really hard years for everybody. There was a lot of suffering, a lot of people passed, a lot of people lost loved ones, and it really plummeted a lot of people into a really dark place. It affected not only their work, but I was seeing patients on a daily basis that we're really suffering from anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder. And that really over time takes a toll on the healthcare provider. It's hard. It's hard to see your patients suffer. It's heartbreaking. It's hard to see patients pass. It is devastating. And when this whole pandemic first started, we never closed our business. My husband's business was open, and I was open for business because we're healthcare and we have a responsibility to our patients to provide healthcare no matter what, no matter if there's a pandemic, no matter if it's cold and flu season, no matter what's going on, we're there. And we were there every single day. I took call 24 7 as needed for patients through the entire pandemic. And I realized shortly into the pandemic when patients were suffering, most of the patients that I was seeing were telehealth because we were shut down all the, as far as inpatient visits, unless it was an urgent, uh, or emergent situation. And then we were allowed to have patients come into the clinic. We were all, uh, geared up testing for Covid, uh, ourselves, making sure that, you know, we had everything to regulation for the state and for the feds so that we kept ourselves and our patients safe. And it was just a really hard time. And probably three months into the shutdown, I told my husband, I said, I don't know if I can keep this up. This is affecting my mental health. I, these patients are suffering and I can't fix what's happening. I can only be there. And he told me at that time, he said, you have to find a way to somehow detach your emotions from what you're having to deal with, or you are gonna go crazy. And he was right. Did I find that way? Not really, not too much, because that's not my personality. My personality is such that I really empathize with patients and how they're feeling. Although I was able to, to a degree, put myself in a bubble and change my behavior during that time. But that also took a toll on me because that's not who I am. And so I found myself, you know, with all of us globally, shut down, socially isolated, not able to do things that we enjoyed, and having that anxiety on what's gonna happen next? What happens tomorrow? What happens in the next hour? What happens next week? Who knows? We don't know. And over a two year period of time, increasing numbers of patients to a point of 2000 patients in our office. And one practitioner was just building up to where I really felt like I was turning into a robot. I was going to work, and then I was coming home, going to bed, getting up a repeat. That's what I did the last four months of this last year, seven days a week. So when they opened up our state and when the nation started to open back up and the world started to open it back up, we started little by little doing things to get out into society. So we weren't so socially isolated, but it was weird. It was weird to be shut down and drive to work for a year and a half and have nobody on the roads. And then you're in a situation where you're starting to re submerge yourself into society and do things. And so one of the things that we did last year in 2021 is what we love to do every year, which is to go to the Roswell Alien Festival over the July 4th weekend. And my son and his girlfriend flew out from Seattle because she had never been there, and my son hadn't been in a few years, and they all wanted to go. So we're sitting at a restaurant, and this is towards the end of the festival. And my son says, you wanna go on a kiss cruise mom? And I said, what? I said, uh, are you talking to me? And he said, yeah, do you wanna go on a kiss cruise? And I said, what is a KISS cruise? And he said, it's a cruise that's put on by kiss, and I want you to go with me. And I looked at his girlfriend and I said, well, what about Laren? Is she gonna go? And she said, Nope, <laugh>. And I said, why do you want your mom to go on a kiss cruise with you? I said, what about your friends? Don't you wanna take your friends? And he said, mom, he said, you took me to my first KISS concert in Vegas. And he said, this is probably gonna be their last cruise where they're in makeup, and I wanna take you to see them on their last cruise in their full attire. And so I thought about it, and I haven't been on a vacation with my son since 2007. I love the band kiss. And he said there were gonna be a lot of other bands there. And so I said, okay, sign me up. I'm gonna go. And, uh, shortly after that, um, I had to have some vaccines. Not for this cruise, but for another trip that was planned. And I had a severe reaction to the rabies vaccine, went into liver failure, kidney failure, uh, developed basically d i c where I was very, very sick for an extended period of time. And, uh, but again, didn't stop working. I was at work every single day. And, uh, so I, I started to get concerned about my health. You know, I mean, what's going on? Why is this happening? And I realized, you know, your mental health directly affects your physical health. I mean, I had never had a reaction to a vaccine like that in my life. And I thought, well, you know, I'll go on this vacation, this weeklong vacation on a kiss cruise, leaving out of la going to Cabo San Lucas back through Ensenada and back home. And, you know, it'll be fun. It'll be, it'll be good with my son. We'll have some quality time together. And so the time came, uh, I think it was, I'm gonna have to look down because I wanna make sure I have the date right. But it started on October 24th, which is when we set, set, set sale. And, um, we show up, we go through, you know, the whole boarding on a cruise. And I've been boarded on a cruise before, but it was a little bit different on this cruise. We were waiting in the holding area to get on, and all these people are all there in their kiss attire. One guy I saw was amazing. He had tattoos of KISS all over, I mean sleeves. He had the kiss jacket on. It was something I only remember from when I was a kid. And they had the whole kind of holding area with the kiss crews, you know, waiting to, uh, board. And everybody was there just having a good time. Everybody was relaxed. Nobody was rushed, nobody looked stressed. It was just a bunch of old guys and gals like me and a few young ones like my son and a few kids just waiting to have a good time. And so we boarded the cruise and you know, I've been on cruises before and I thought, yeah, you know, this'll be great. It'll be fun. And oh my gosh, when Kiss Now they were not in their full attire. They did not have their makeup on, but they did the Sailaway, uh, concert. And it was completely like I was transformed back in time, back to the 1970s when I was a kid, when I first heard kiss. And just thinking about it is making me shake right now. It was something I can't even describe, but it was like that social isolation, that depression, that anxiety, that post-traumatic stress that I was feeling with all of my patients was gone. It was gone. And I could not believe it. And so we listened for over an hour to kiss, just playing their songs, just having a good time, just talking to the audience. And, you know, I was nervous prior to getting on the ship because I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't party. I'm your typical total grade, a number one nerd. If there's ever a nerd, it's me. And I loved Kiss when I was a kid, but I wasn't cool like my friends, you know, we, I I wasn't really allowed to listen to Kiss music because my parents listened to old country, which is fine. I like all genres of music. I think it's all good. I think you can find quality in any form of music. So when I would listen to Kiss, you know, when I was listening on that boat, I was transformed kind of back in time. I was just transported back in time to my best friend's house and sitting on the floor with her green shag carpet while her mom was at work, and her older sister and two older sisters and our two friends across the street just listening to Kiss music. And of course, they would be dancing to Kiss music, and I was too shy. I would just be sitting there wishing I was cool like them. And so my son and I were up on the deck, not down on the floor, kind of center stage outside where usually they have the, the big pool. And what was so amazing is there were people in the hot tub listening to Kiss. There were people on the deck, there were people down center stage, and everybody was just having a good time. And it just, it was like, it was magical. And after Kiss played and we sailed away, the bands were gonna be playing this whole time. So this was just like a party rock and roll cruise. It was just amazing. Something I'd never experienced when I'd been on cruises before I went to the art shows. And, you know, I went to the, you know, the, the different, uh, shows that they had with the showgirls and everything, but I had never done anything like this. And so we go to our room and I find this waiting for us. It was so amazing. So we got all this KISS memorabilia. They gave us this snow globe. Actually, I have two because they tried to confiscate my sons coming back through, uh, customs and at the airport, which was not gonna happen. This is like super special. We got our dog tags into the Kiss Navy, which was absolutely amazing. Got some key chains, which was also fantastic. But that wasn't the best part. The best part was actually listening to these performers talk. I mean, the songs were great. The music was fantastic. I felt like I was a kid again. But listening to how their lives had progressed, history as they called it, was absolutely phenomenal. They p played Kiss History on the TV in our room and our, on our crews 24 7 from their movies to their concerts, to their backstage, you know, groupy Girls, which, you know, obviously I would, was never anything pretty enough to be like that, but I didn't care. I just liked the music. And they had tons of bands. Now, this is where I have to have some of my, uh, some of my stuff because actually we, we set Sail on Monday, October 24th, and I'm gonna bend down, so you're gonna miss me for a minute now I'm back up. But we left on the 24th. And so I was so excited to see Kiss. It was just absolutely amazing. And then after they finished playing, oh my gosh, it was LA Guns and that was phenomenal. So nobody knows this until I got back on from the cruise, and my husband is sitting across from me right now, but the only person who's ever been a musician that I ever had a crush on was Tracy Guns. I never saw him in concert until now, until this cruise. And he was playing on stage. And I, I looked over at my son, I was like, oh my God, that's my total crush, Tracy Guns. I can't believe it. He's here. And so, obviously I'm not the groupie type, I'm the total nerd type. So I just watching and clapping and screaming and having a good time. And we saw so many bands. We saw Baron, we saw Docan and Lynch reunion. We Lynch Mob was fantastic. We saw the fifth, we saw the aviators, heart to Heart, SI City, the Alive Green Jello, which is now now called Green Jelly, because I guess the Jello company didn't like them using the Jello name. We <laugh>. And we saw them multiple times, which was amazing. And we could sit anywhere we wanted. And then of course, we saw Kiss in Concert dressed up full attire. We were on the floor. 10, 15 feet away from watching them do their show. It was absolutely amazing. But again, the most amazing part was not the concert, it was actually getting to know these people on a more personal level, and the fact that they, they have had struggles and that they are human, and that they have survived, and they've actually conquered and moved into a new dimension of their lives. So that was amazing. I mean, to have tea time with Tommy Thayer and watch him teach somebody how to, how to, you know, put golf balls was incredible. Watching Paul Stanley Cook Pasta for individuals on stage was fantastic. And trying, Paul Stanley's Pizza was amazing. Eric Singer did face painting, which was phenomenal. We watched a, a version of like the Newlywed Game with Gene Simmons in his wonderful wife with other couples on stage. I mean, stuff that you would never see. And, and it was just so down to earth and so heartwarming. And the whole time I was on the cruise, I just had this surrealistic experience that this is how life should be. I mean, obviously not on a cruise with Kiss and all these bands, 365 days a year, but I mean, how I should feel. I sh the whole time I was on that cruise when it first started, I started having these little blips of serenity. And as the cruise went on, it got bigger and bigger. And I was experiencing, it's hard to describe, but people who've had that feeling when they're stressed and all of a sudden there's that moment and everything's just serene. It's fantastically phenomenal. Y I can't even describe it. I was getting up at six o'clock in the morning working out with some of these young guys that are now playing for these older bands and some of the old guys that are in the older bands. I'd get up early, I'd be one of the first people at the buffet, and I figured out that the lead singer of Green Jelly probably doesn't need much sleep because he would be down there too, as well as the lead singer from La Guns. And there was no mobs, there were no groupies bothering this, these performers. It was just like everybody could have a good time. There were no politics involved, no stress. It was just people with no agenda except to have fun and listen to music. And man, is that what I ever needed? And while I was on that cruise, I started thinking, I have to have more serenity because I need happiness. I'm getting sick. I'm so stressed with everything that's been going on in the world that I, this can't keep going on. Because while I was on that, that cruise, I did not have any feeling of illness whatsoever. I felt fantastic. We went to Cabo, my son and I got to go snorkeling together. We got to go kayaking and paddle boarding. We went to Ensenada and we went on a hike, which was phenomenal. We wandered off into the city and found this local restaurant with Ama amazing ceviche. It was just fantastic. And then we listened to Kiss with Giving the history, and all the band members were up there, and it was just amazing to hear their story. And then we listened to, um, several of the other bands just talk about, you know, their experiences. We watched a guitar riff with Tommy Thayer, and we watched, uh, uh, a drum riff with Eric Singer where they had contests, you know, for who were the best drummers and the best guitarists. And I'll tell you, listening to those guitar players and those drummers, they were really good. But when you, there's a difference between that and the professionals. And you could see in all these professional musicians how hard they worked for what they had. And it just changed and put a whole new spin on it for me. And then when I went to the talk that Doc McGee did, it was a total game changer for me when he was talking about quality time remaining and how he had brought Kiss back and how he's brought these other bands into light and everything that he's done. And that nothing really matters if you're not true to yourself and doing what's important to you with your quality time remaining. Because how long do we have? Who knows? You know, could have, I could have 30 years, I could have 40 years, I could have an hour. I don't really know. And in listening to him, I had this whole change of heart in what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. And that's why I decided to make a change in the practice. And I decided that for the quality time remaining, what it was important to me was providing quality care to patients. And so that's what we're doing. But my whole point of the story is not on me, but it's on the experience. And I, I think everybody should go on a KISS cruise. It's fantastic. It's phenomenal. But that's not probably for everybody. But what is for everybody is what's important to them and their quality time remaining. And I know there's so many people out there that are stressed, that are anxious, that are depressed, both panic attacks, PTs, d, social anxiety. A agoraphobia, you know, fear of going out into society. And it was there, it was like that prior to Covid, but it's been even worse now. And the point of this podcast is to encourage people to get out there. I'm not saying you have to be on a cruise with a couple of thousand people if you're not comfortable with that. But maybe go out into the mountains and hike whatever it is that you love to do. If you love to ski, if you love to be on the lake, if you love to ride your bike or whatever it is, don't waste your time worrying about things you can't change. Spend your time living your life. We got one, we all have one life and that's it. And once it's gone, we don't know what happens. But we just have this, we have the here and now we have the present. And so I don't wanna put anybody's health at risk. I don't want people to do anything they're uncomfortable with. But I wanna encourage people because Doc McGee and that kiss cruise, it was like an epiphany for me on something that had been lacking in my life for a very long time. But then over the last two to three years, had really, I had really taken a plummet, just kind of a nose dive into, I'm gonna work the rest of my life and just be a robot. And then I went on that cruise and I listened to Gene Simmons, to Tommy Thayer, to Paul Stanley, to Eric Singer, to the lead singer of Green Jelly, who I absolutely adore to listening to Tracy Guns talk about his music. I mean, it was fantastic. And we just had fun, you know, and that's what life is about, having fun, whatever you like to do. I'm probably the least likely person that anybody would think would be on a KISS cruise. But people don't know what I was like when I was a kid. I was just like this, except I listened to Kiss, I listened to bad company, I listened to heart, I listened to A C D C, I listened to Blue Oyster Cult as well as Hank Juniors, Hank Williams, Johnny Cash, June Carter, my mom's favorite, Patsy Klein, uh, you know, Aaron Nevilles, you name it. I listened to it because my aunts liked something different. My parents liked something different. And then of course, my friends and I were just cooling. We liked rock and roll. But the point is, do what you love because you only have this life to do it in. And I just felt like I really wanted to bring that across. I couldn't sleep last night because I was thinking about, my son sent me a, uh, a text and it had Paul Stanley flying through the air coming from the back of the audience down to the stage. And he said, mom, thanks so much for going on that KISS cruise. It was the best experience ever. And I said, yeah, it was. I said that, that is one of the best, if not the best experiences I've had in my life. And it was exciting to have that experience with my son because we hung out 24 7 together. I mean, we, we shared a room. We had these awesome, cool twin beds. We watched KISS movies all night long. We got up at the crack of dawn and we were all day go, go, go. And it was just the best. I had to go back to work to recover from the exhaustion. But it was also that relaxation as well. The mental relaxation of just listening to other people, having and watching people, having fun and doing that myself. And Kiss Cruise is gonna be two, 2024. And I'm gonna be there because it was an experience like no other. And I liked being transported back in time to my childhood. So I just wanna put a shout out to every single band that was on that cruise. And a thank you so much to kiss for putting that on. You totally saved me kiss and I appreciate that. And I wanna give a shout out to Kathy V, who's always been supportive of me since I met you in 2009. And I just appreciate you so much and thank you for always being there. And thank you for all of my friends and all of my family and all of the listeners. I appreciate you taking time to listen. And I wish you health and happiness and pursuing what makes you happy and realizing you can do anything you want. You just have to work for it. And you just have to, to do it. Don't, don't let life pass you by. Have fun. And that, that's my hope. And I thank you and I appreciate you and I'm thankful for everyone who's listening. And, um, thank you Tracy Guns for being my, uh, my 30 year crush.

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